There are two things (that happen to be polar opposites) that wise parents can do to ensure their children’s happiness as summer winds down. One is to plan and prepare. The other is to enjoy the moment wholeheartedly. As a start to both, the beginning of August is a good time to get a calendar and show your child exactly how much time is left before school starts. Use it to plan your good times: “We have ten days here, when we’ll be at Grandma’s cottage by the lake.” Or, “Which of these weekends do you want to put up the tent in the back yard and have a sleepover with your cousins?”

Then do the preparation, in five easy steps, that makes the transition back to the school an easy one.

1.      Find the school reading list and make sure there’s reading built in to your schedule so the child doesn’t feel overwhelmed when school begins. Also, preparing for the new hours of the school day can help a child feel less overwhelmed. At least ten days before the start of school, begin to change your child’s sleep schedule.

2.      If your child hasn’t been seeing school friends, reconnect before the first day of classes. Children’s interests, friendships, and levels of maturity can change a lot in three months. It’s better to experience social changes away from the stress of a new school room.

3.      If your child is transitioning to a new school, walk around with your child and find the gym, the lunchroom, the library, and any classrooms the child will be in. Talk to someone who’s been in the new teacher’s class so the child has some idea of what to expect.

4.      Involve the child in decision making about after-school schedules: homework, snacks, having friends over, and activities such as sports or art lessons. You can set rules and offer suggestions, but make sure your suggestions are in accord with your child’s strengths and interests.

5.      If your child has issues with executive function (getting organized, keeping track of belongings) discuss ways to improve results. This is a great time to make a fresh start on correcting problems and enhancing skills.

And once you and your child have done back-to-school planning, get back to the business of enjoying summer. The last few weeks of summer should be different from the rest of the year; clambakes, flashlight tag, playing sardines, canasta games that involve six decks and take all afternoon, camping out, rafting, or just taking a picnic to the lakefront.  Maybe you’ll fly kites. Maybe your child will show you what it’s like to chew six pieces of bubble gum and blow a giant bubble. Maybe everyone will put on bathing suits and give the dog a bath. Before the school year gets started, give your child time to be a kid. Summer’s lesson is this: enjoy what you have while you’ve got it, especially when what you’ve got is good weather and free time. One of the most important things a busy parent can teach a child is how to relax.